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Here’s how I feel about submission and, no, I don’t mean like the 50 Shades of Grey kind. I’m talking about submitting yourself to another human being.

I think that most of the men I deal with find it hard to believe that I’m actually a full supporter of women submitting to men. I say that they probably find it hard to believe because a lot of times I’m strutting around with my Ms. Independent stick that for them to think that I’d willing allow myself to give up the freedom of independence, ludicrous.

Allow me to explain both sides of the coin. Yes, I may be perceived as difficult, brash, and maybe even ornery, but all in all, I’m really just testing the relationship to see if maybe, just maybe, he may be a man who I can submit to. I’m very away that most people frown on my terminology of “testing” a relation or people but all in all, isn’t that the crux of what dating is? A trial run to see if I’d like to  to spend exclusive time with another person for an indefinite amount of time with the hopes of it being long-term? I think that is the exact point, so miss me the BS about not testing people and their limitations. You do it every day so let’s just call a spade a spade.

Let me define by idea of submission just so we have a clear definition. I think of submission as allowing my man to lead us and resting assured that it’s to a place of prosperity and never lack. It’s not questioning his decisions for us because I already know he’s making them with our best interest in mind.  It’s following his directions without question or debate because his word is final. It’s not about losing something but gaining something. It’s not about weakness or meekness or docility but about strength, courage and awareness. It’s about love in the highest form, trust in utmost, and respect unmatched.

With that being said, here is why I struggle with submission. I struggle with it so much because I have yet to find that long-term relationship where I have all of these elements in play. Do I feel I have a partner I could submit to? Yes. Could I submit to him right now? No. Being that I have displayed acts of submission prior in regards to he and I, he did not fulfill all of my needs or requirements that I felt warranted him my submission.

One must be worthy of being submitted to. How can you expect me to ride off into the sunset with you, unquestioningly, if I don’t trust that your taking me to place of safety and security? How can you expect me to follow your directives if they completely contradict my nature and values? I believe that submission does not just occur in a woman to a man, but also from a man to a woman. A man should submit himself to his woman by showing her loyalty and concern. He should not discard or devalue her input or opinion. He should consider her at all times because, like he, she should have their best interest in mind. He should always want to keep her in place of peace, for there should be no worries in her mind.

When I think of submission, I think of us  and not just me, I think of we but above all else I think of the magnitude of love and adoration that we have for each other that allows us to be completely open and trusting of another throughout this journey called life.

I’m ready to embrace the one that is worthy of all I’m willing to give.

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